yes. yes, I will.

My children know the secret words that can get me to stop whatever it is I’m doing, at any given moment.

Mom will you snuggle with me?

I’m a working mom. And a work-at-home mom. And come June 1st I’ll be a work-outside-the-home mom. Sometimes I wonder if I’ve really been there enough for my kiddos, even though I’ve been here for almost every moment of their lives. And I worry a teensy bit about how this move to working outside my kitchen will affect them. Will they tire of shuttling back and forth between the Cottage? Will they resent our ever-growing business? Will they feel like they missed out on some essential part of childhood because their mother didn’t just have a job but was passionate about the job that she created?

I totally get the working mom guilt. And I get the stay at home mom angst. I see both sides of that coin. And sometimes I think I’ve struck the perfect balance. Other times I wonder, when all is said and done, if my children will say that’s so.

Gosh I hope so.

In the meantime, I know one thing that will never change. I will always give an unequivocal, unfaltering, immediate YES to my favorite question,

Mom will you snuggle with me?

And surely that will count for something.

NatalieJanuary 20, 2012 - 7:07 am

As long as you love them, that’s all that matters. I think you’re doing fine Erin. 🙂

heather mayberryJanuary 20, 2012 - 8:07 am

from the outside, i think that you have been there enough for them. i know you always will be. they won’t resent you but they will learn from you. you have an amazing work ethic (from what i can see on here) and you love what you do. not many people can say that. they will grow with you and feel your stress when you feel it. that’s part of having children. they love you and you love them and i’m almost certain that you’ll still be getting snuggle requests when they have kids.

Jessica WJanuary 20, 2012 - 10:13 am

What a sweet photo!

JenniferJanuary 20, 2012 - 4:41 pm

That will count for A LOT! But don’t kid yourself, you’re doing a great job and you had a great teacher – who is now an awesome Grama. 🙂

Aunt LuJanuary 20, 2012 - 7:56 pm

THAT will count for everything!

JessicaJanuary 22, 2012 - 11:31 am

Love your blog. Love this post. I am going thru something similar and it’s good to know that I am not alone with both the working mom guilt and the stay at home mom angst and wondering what my kids will say or feel when it’s all said and done. Thank you.

You have a beautiful family.

SamJanuary 23, 2012 - 9:48 am

As a mom who has always worked outside the home while dad is the stay-at-home parent I have to believe that being present when present is the best any of us can give our kids. Is it still darn hard sometimes to scoot off to work when my kiddos want me home… oh yeah it is. But when push comes to shove if they can tell me in 20 years that they always knew they were loved then I will feel like I did my job.

Good luck with your new ventures:)

Elise DavisJanuary 25, 2012 - 8:41 pm

I think kids are given a real gift when they get to see their parents involved in something they care about whether it’s in the home or out of the home. And I think there is so much to be role modeled to children in having a job and caring for the job.

And I also imagine from what you wrote that you will manage to make the time with them true quality time.

Congratulations to you on having a job you are passionate about – and children who love to cuddle!

ClaireJanuary 26, 2012 - 10:12 am

Hey there

Totally get it. I wrote a similar thing on my blog about a year ago (http://www.momtrepreneur.co.za/guilt-tripping-on-mommy-lane/)

I’m sure you are the perfect Mom and you at least know you’re not the only one. Don’t doubt yourself and remember, you have a life too and you must also look after yourself and make yourself happy AND I’m sure you love what you do!

Laine GriffinJanuary 26, 2012 - 10:44 am

I work full time from home, too. I feel like I can’t ever give enough. I’m here, but I’m not “here.” Sometimes I feel like the kids would be better off at a babysitter. But I know that’s not true. Right now, along with busting my butt trying to build this career, I’m working on giving them time too. There is no easy answer to this, except, as you say, “yes. yes, I will.”

GingerJanuary 26, 2012 - 10:57 am

I’m a work outside the home mom. My mom was a work outside the home mom. My husband is a work at home dad. His mother was a work wherever you could get it mom.

I know this: I was loved by mother. I don’t look back on my childhood and wonder that, or wish she could have been there more, or want a different background. I *KNOW* she loved me, and that she did everything she could for me and our family. My husband is the same way. All I can do, all any of us can do, is hope our kids look back and say the same thing. Whether we’re at home, at work, it doesn’t really matter in the end as long as our kids know they’re important, and loved. That we made the time we had with them important and that we gave them attention and devotion–not at every second, but when they needed it and when we can give it, and enough that they know it’s not just a task to be accomplished.

I’m guessing your kids will know that.

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